Why do programmers confuse Halloween with Christmas? Because OCT 31 == DEC 25.

No one has ever pair-programmed with Chuck Norris and lived to tell the tale.

I enrolled in an online school to become a private investigator. I gave them my money, and then I never heard back from them. I thought, Either I just got ripped off, or this is my first case.

In the medical community, death is referred to as "Chuck Norris Disease"

If you are what you eat … I need to eat a skinny person.